I've got a new hobby
I leave notes hidden around my house in places where my housemates will find them, suggesting helpful ways in which they might like to kill themselves.
In the medicine cupboard: Take all of these and die, bitch.
Above the plug socket: Fingers go here.
Inside their socks: Tie together to fashion a makeshift noose.
A trail of chocolate buttons, in the shape of arrows, leading from their bedroom door, outside into the main road. Wait here.
(I don't know what I would do if I didn't have Donna and Zoe to keep me sane.)
In the medicine cupboard: Take all of these and die, bitch.
Above the plug socket: Fingers go here.
Inside their socks: Tie together to fashion a makeshift noose.
A trail of chocolate buttons, in the shape of arrows, leading from their bedroom door, outside into the main road. Wait here.
(I don't know what I would do if I didn't have Donna and Zoe to keep me sane.)
2 Comments:
I'm personally volunteering to come over and slap you upside the head.
Deal?
You don't find my faux hatred charming?!
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